I

The library was empty when Buffy walked in.

Not that that was unusual, but Giles usually poked his head out from wherever he was hiding to see who had dared enter his sanctuary.

No poking this time. She frowned, heading for his office.

He was sitting at his desk, staring at a piece of paper, his body rigid.

"Hi," she said softly.

He still jumped. "Oh...Buffy. I didn't hear you."

"I figured. What's up?"

"What? Oh...." He turned the paper face down. "Nothing."

"Last time you said that, you'd just read the prophesy that I was gonna die."

He swallowed guiltily. "No, it's...it's nothing like that. It's personal."

"Last time you said that, we wound up battling Eyghon."

He stared at her for a moment, emotions she couldn't understand playing across his face. "It's not like that this time," he said softly.

"Then what?"

His eyes dropped to the paper on his desk and he turned it over slowly. "M-my father...is quite ill."

Buffy felt a shiver go through her. Somehow it never occurred to her that Giles had family. Parents. "I'm sorry," she said. "In England?"

"Yes." He glanced at the paper again. "I...I'm going to have to...make arrangements to go over there."

She frowned. "Is he...?"

He glanced at her before looking away, and she was stunned by the raw pain in his expression. He nodded briefly.

"I'm sorry," she said again, feeling helpless. Of all the awful times for this to happen, this had to be the worst. He was still reeling from the death of Ms. Calendar. And now to have his father dying as well. She didn't know how much more he could take.

He swallowed and went on. "I don't like having to leave you alone...."

"I'll be okay," she soothed. "You go, take care of...stuff. Don't worry about me."

He just smiled sadly. "I...I don't know how long I'll be gone. It rather depends on...."

"I know. Don't worry."

He gazed at her, his expression unfathomable. At least to Buffy.

"Well. I suppose I'd better...see to things." He methodically folded the piece of paper and set it aside.

"Anything I can do?" she asked.

"Yes." He stood up. "Keep your head down. Be careful. I'm taking a risk, leaving you like this. Especially with-" He stopped abruptly. It didn't matter, she knew what he'd meant. And she knew he'd seen the pain as it flickered across her face. Pain reflected in his own.

"I'll be careful," she said simply.

He gazed at her intensely for a moment, then the smallest of smiles played around his mouth. "He would have liked to have met you."

"Your father?" she frowned. "Why?"

"It's always an honor for a watcher to meet a slayer. I'd rather hoped I could take you over after your high school graduation."

She thought about that for a minute. "Did he ever have a slayer?"

He shook his head. "Not every watcher gets the responsibility. It's considered a great honor. I know he always thought he should have. I'm sure he thought he could do it better. He could never understand why...." His voice faltered. "Why they chose me. I think he was, well, envious."

Buffy frowned. Giles was a grown-up. But from the sound of it, it seemed like in his father's eyes he was still a kid-a never-good-enough kid.

"I wish I could come with you," she said softly.

He looked over at her. "You've got school. Not to mention how we could possibly explain it to your mother."

"Spring break's next week," she reminded him. "I'll have a week off."

"I need to leave before then," he said. "I can't take the risk."

"So I'll miss a day."

"It would be more like two days, possibly three. And it's impossible."

She folded her arms. There had to be some way.... "If I figure it out, can I come?"

"Buffy...."

"Can I?"

He just stared at her. "Why is this so important to you?"

"It's not to me, but it is to you," she explained. "I just.... You're always there for me. Every time I need you. I guess I just-wanna return the favor. You shouldn't have to go through this alone. Especially not after...." It was still too new, too raw to talk about easily.

He smiled sadly. "Thank you." The smile faded. "But it's impossible."

The problem was, it might just be impossible. But she had to be sure. "Give me 'til tomorrow morning."

"I was hoping to leave tomorrow afternoon."

"Please?"

He sighed. "All right." He rubbed his forehead wearily. "You know the airfare is going to be astronomical."

As long as she was going, she might as well go whole-hog. "Let me work on that, too. I'll see what I can swing. Don't do anything about a ticket until you hear from me. Tomorrow evening's flight?"

"If possible."

"Cool. I'll be in touch. It'll work out, you'll see." She smiled at him and he reluctantly smiled back.

Then with a touch of his arm, she was gone.

The first step was to find Willow.

Her friend was in the computer lab, working. She seemed to spend most of her free time here lately, either working on lesson plans or.... Buffy swallowed. It still felt weird, not seeing Ms. Calendar here.

"Hey, Will," she greeted.

"Hi, Buffy," Willow smiled. "What's up?"

"What are you doing over Spring Break?"

Willow shrugged. "More of the usual, probably. Hanging out, watching bad TV, getting bored. Though Oz said the band was playing down in Marina on Saturday, so I'm going down there with him. Why?"

Buffy leaned in, speaking softly. "I need a cover for about a week."

Willow frowned. "What for?"

"Going to England with Giles."

Willow's eyes lit up. "He's taking you to England? Cool!"

"Not so cool," she corrected. "His father's dying and he has to go over there, you know, to deal with stuff. I want to go with him, so he doesn't have to be alone. And I wouldn't mind getting out of Sunnydale, either." Getting away from Angel, away from the memories....

"I hear you," Willow nodded. Yes, Willow understood.

"Anyway, my mom's gone 'til Tuesday, but I'll need cover 'til next Friday, at least. Can you do it?"

"Sure. Just tell her you're going with me and my family to, um, Carmel to visit relatives."

"You got relatives in Carmel?"

"Yep."

It was a good plan. Her mother wouldn't question it, and it would be a likely excuse for Buffy to be away. Now all she needed to do was take care of the next couple of days.

"Okay, that's one. Now, how can I rig taking Thursday and Friday off?"

Willow frowned, considering. "He can't wait 'til Friday?"

"He's not sure he's got that much time, if he wants to get there while his father's still alive."

"Whoa," Willow's eyes got bigger. "Poor Giles."

"I know," Buffy agreed. "That's why I want to go with him. What about this week?"

"The safest one is the handwriting program," Willow said. "If you can get a sample of your mother's writing. I can set up this program to copy it. Then we just write a note explaining that she's going out of town and wants you to come with her. Since she's not home, it can't be checked."

"Okay, but what do I do about my mom calling me every day?"

"Call her and tell her you're gonna stay with me for the next couple of nights so we can plan for our trip. Then if she calls, I can answer, say you're in the shower, or out running or something."

Buffy smiled. "You know, Will, you'd really make a great criminal master-mind."

"It gives me something to think about," Willow grinned. "Like puzzles."

"Okay, then here's one more for you. Airfares that won't bankrupt Giles."

Willow whistled low. "With two days' notice? That's tough. By now they'd all be full-fare."

"I know. That's what I want help with. Something cheaper."

"That's stealing." Willow frowned.

"No, it's...it's an extenuating circumstance. Don't they have funeral fares or something?"

Willow chewed her lip. "Hmm. There might be a way. It won't be cheap, but it might be better than full fare. But I'll need Giles's credit card number."

"I'll get it. And thanks." Buffy smiled at her.

"No problem. Tell Giles...." Willow paused, another frown wrinkling her forehead. "What do you say to somebody when someone is dying but hasn't died yet?"

Buffy shrugged. "I just told him I was sorry. You should've seen him, Will. He looked so-sad. Stunned, shocked, and really sorry. I kinda got the impression he and his father weren't close. But it still must be hard. Especially after...you know."

"I know," Willow shook her head. "Poor Giles."

By the following afternoon, the plans were in place. Buffy would be excused from classes Thursday afternoon and all day Friday. Mrs. Summers believed her daughter would be spending her Spring Break in Carmel with Willow and her family. And a flight out was booked for three o'clock the next day. Giles sighed, saying he had hoped to leave today, but Willow explained that the Thursday seats saved him almost $1,000 between the two tickets, so he was resigned to it.

Buffy was worried about how subdued he seemed, going along with her plans almost mechanically, a quiet sadness about him. Even her usual silly-talk and teasing failed to penetrate his melancholy.

"I'm sorry we can't leave 'til tomorrow," she said. He remained silent, filing cards. "I just thought, you know, it would be better." Still nothing.

She took a deep breath. "Giles, do you even

want me to come with you?"

He stopped, gazing at her blankly. "You're the one who begged to go, if I recall."

"I know. Because I want to be there for you. But I can't tell if you want me there or if I'm just being a pest. I don't want you to have go through this by yourself. It's bad enough you're alone because of-"

"Buffy, that's enough!"

She stepped back, startled. She knew he had quite a temper, had seen it a couple of times. But he rarely got angry at her, really angry, so it was always a shock when he did. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "But not talking about something doesn't make it go away."

He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "I know you mean well," he looked at her. "But your timing is wretched."

"I'm sorry," she said again, feeling terrible. It seemed no matter what she did or said, she messed up.

He took a deep breath. "So am I. Just...don't push, all right?"

She nodded, swallowing back the tears which threatened. Way to go, Buffy. What else can you wreck while you're at it?

He was still looking at her, another one of those unfathomable expressions on his face: hurt, sorrow, and things she couldn't even explain.

"I've gotta get to class," she mumbled, and

turned to leave the library.

"Buffy." His voice stopped her before she reached the door, and she turned around. "Make sure you're packed in the morning; I'll give you a lift."

Now there was something she could understand in his look, something beyond the pain. Understanding, kindness. Giles. She nodded and gave him a little smile, turning around again. Maybe she hadn't wrecked it as much as she thought.

"Oh, and," he called her back. "Make sure you pack something...appropriate."

"I will," she said softly.